brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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