He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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