i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
