Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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