His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Randomize