Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
