i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
We need a shit load of segways right now
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
