i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
this boner is exhausting
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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