She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
