my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize