me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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