Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
