Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
