I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I touched a dick in church today
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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