420 ftw
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
