i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
