laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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