Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
