my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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