Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize