I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
