We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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