I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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