who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
