So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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