Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
