i already hear my dad disowning me
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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