is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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