tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
