I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm at about main and main street
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize