I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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