dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
