I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
