the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I believe in your delicious
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
