Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
