frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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