so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
