we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
