Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
