Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
