I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
