did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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