i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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