hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
