Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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