We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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