Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize