i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
she pinky promised me she was 18
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
