I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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