he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Randomize
