Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
