And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize